For day 1, activity 2 of Summer Learning Journey we had to imagine that we were on one of the wakas. Then we had to write a letter to a friend. We had to tell our friend about our voyage to New Zealand. We also had to tell our friend how we felt about moving to a country.
Dear...
My journey to New Zealand was awesome. When I first came to New Zealand I could see lots of building, cars and more. We passed a shiny city that could nearly touch the sky. We saw dolphins, fishes and other sea creatures. There was people standing on mountains. I had a fun time at New Zealand. Next time I come here I will take you.
Hi Sakina,
ReplyDeleteI liked how you started your answer using a letter structure. For the future consider to add the name of person, it can be either a friend or a fictional name, as this will make your written more personal and authentic. Great use of descriptive words in your text, maybe you could try also to describe how do you feel as this would make your written even more compelling and engaging.
Kia Kaha,
Patricia
Greetings there Sakina,
ReplyDeleteMy name is Aletheia and I attend to Tamaki Primary School and I was also doing the summer learning journey but already finished.
I loved how you had completed a task for the summer learning journey plus I really enjoy reading you letter to your frist but I will agree with Patricia which is to add your friends name so your readers can know who you are writing it to.
I think you have did a great job but something else is putting more information into your letter plus also adding some images for your readers and people to see not just your writing but your pictures to make is so outstanding for them to take a look at.
I really liked the way when you had went out of the box and used sea creatures and things that you imagined to see if you went.
Great Job and have a happy new year for 2018!
Cheers,
Aletheia!